Phishing Buddies

If you're going to phish for my bank account info, could you please at least have a friend proof your English? I received this recently from "Bank off Amrica":

Yesterday we have difficults with our bank server and you need to confirm your data. You can't make an operations with you bank card without confirmation. Data transmission is fully encripted and absolutely safe for you! Sorry for inconvenience and be careful with filling the form.

I save outstanding spam. I've got a special gmail label for them. Some classic headlines:

Help for short panis is here!

hi from Jesus. i am here sitting in the internet caffe. I am 25 y.o.girl.

Regain of lovemaking capacity - When the crysis ends?

Don't be a flaccid-tool carer

I love the ones that are completely inexplicable:

Do not ignore me please,
I found you email somewhere and now decided to write you.
Let me know if you do not mind. If you want 
I can send you some pictures of me.
I am a nice pretty girl. 
Don't reply to this email.

But probably my favorite is a series of spam messages to (a restaurant I wrote a web site for) asking for reservations for every day for 20 straight days. I cannot for the life of me figure out what they were after. I got about ten of these over a several week period all with different names:

Good Morning,

I am Mr.Jones Morgan, I want to book dinner for my members 
in your Restaurant. Please confirm these reservation in your Facility.

Details of the Reservation :

Date: 1st May to 20th
May 2008.
No of person:3 Guest
Arrival times: 6:30 PM each day.

Payment Type:Credit Card Only (I hope you have credit card facilities)

Please confirm if you have the availability and provide me with the 
total cost for 3 Guest in 20 Days,Then we will make an advance 
payment to hold the booking.

I await your swift response.

Jones Morgan.

No phone number provided, only a return address of "". As usual, I don't understand the point.


Compliment of the season to you. How are you and family? Please could you be touched my mercy to assist me on this issue? Well, following the sudden death of my father, Late General Sanni Abacha,the former head of state of the federal republic of Nigeria in June 1998, I have been thrown into a state of utter confusion, frustration and hopelessness by the present civilian administrations. Security agents in Nigeria have subjected me to physical and psychological tortures. I am often being detained as well as arraigned before a Federal High Court of Nigeria for an offence I did not commit. As the eldest surviving son , that is so traumatized, I have lost hope and confidence in anybody within the country. You must have heard over the media/internet on the recovery of various huge sums of money deposited by my late father in different security firms abroad. Some willingly gave up their secrets and disclosed our money confidently lodged with them and many out-rightly declined lodgment. In fact the total sum discovered by the Government so far is to the tune of $700 million dollars. And the government has not relented in its efforts to completely bring my mother, myself and every other member of the family back to square one. This is why I deemed it necessary to act fast by contacting anybody abroad for assistance. Furthermore, due to the security network placed on my daily activities I cannot afford to visit any embassy for a possible solution,hence I have decided to contact you and I do hope you will be the person God is going to use to rescue my family and I. I have deposited the sum of $35 million dollars in diguise as personal effects as whose name is withheld for now for security reasons until we fully commence communication. I shall be grateful if you could receive this fund on my behalf for safekeeping. Adequate arrangement has been made for receiving the fund. It is totally risk free. You are entitled to 30% of the total sum. I hope to invest a proportion of the balance in your country. Please forward your private Telephone and Fax numbers so that we can fully commence communication immediately. I will quite appreciate, if you accept my proposal in good faith. I look forward to receiving your urgent reply to my plea.